Bienavenue au Matt's Page

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Matt was born in the microscopic town of Canaan, which is of no biblical importance whatsoever. He attended the pathetic worm of a high school called, "Mascoma Valley Regional High" where he was viciously antagonized until he discovered the opposite sex. He attended Carnegie-Mellon University for all of two months before deciding that he didn't need a degree to be pathetic and left for home to live in a cozy and disgusting apartment with his father. After trying out a career in the record industry (ie: selling them) fate walked him into the offices of Burlington Coat Factory Warehouse who was sucker enough to hire him. After many years of happy freeloading he has risen to his greatest level of incompetence, namely Managing Network Dude. He hopes to get a real life sometime in the future (though quantum probability would rather avoid it). He is currently happily married to a beautiful Swiss woman who would rather be somewhere else.

As a new addition to their family they also now have a sympathetically Swiss canine, Danny, a Bernese Mountain Dog. Though the love of their life he seems to have been saddly missed when they were handing out "fetch" genes.